I was astonishingly tired yesterday night. I dove into practising what I read in Bluth’s and Goldberg’s book, trying to uncover the “soul” of shapes. I was challenged to think differently about what I’m doing. I did some additional research on shapes, until I felt like I had destroyed whatever I had wanted to draw by the amount of analysis done. The laser burned the subject.

The other half of the day was me wildly experimenting with my Carnosaur 2 notes and trying to put everything through a blender and reforging it. With the “find the essence” mindset from drawing that day I was surprised to find what I identified as “essence” of character archetype, story archetype, in this case soldier action movie more than a creature movie. I failed spectacularly writing maybe 5 versions of the main story line to express what I saw in it and nothing worked. I took a 3 hour break and then returned to think about why I could not write through a Carnosaur 2 fanscript like I had written through my own Corvus comic.
Then I had my epiphany. I hadn’t researched enough. Of course I couldn’t really give substance to creatures, a human antagonist and the setting…because I haven’t understood any of those. Research does not mean looking up facts like in school in this case, rather building an understanding of what is possible and how things would work if I wanted to keep it realistical. I could always cross over to the surreal and fantastical from there, but never the other way around. My script had not enough substance to feel right yesterday. Let’s revisit soon.

This day saw me waking up with new energy and a good mood to finish studying the book. I did succeed in this, I did suceed in quite some research for Carnosaur 2’s setting and basic military rules and conventions. I am forever grateful for my husband’s patient input and inspiration when it comes to things like these. When I don’t even know what to google he usually provides me with an idea or two how I could close the gap between myself and the creative problem that I want to solve.

Also this day saw me less anxious than usual. All that geometry, forms, shapes training does pay off already, combined with Bluth’s and Goldberg’s wisdom on pictoral composition the effect for my future art is even bigger. I created interesting shots for a commission with a confidence and such an outcome that blew myself away. I need and want more of that in my life and hope to continue this path. And I will share with you how to walk it, too. It seems that I start to get more talkative in these almost daily blogs, too.

I stumbled upon the spiral symbol when researching more shapes and their effects yesterday. I have no idea what to make of it, but it seems like the spirals might stay with me, not only because I love Junji Ito’s Uzumaki.
An extreme close-up of a face. I remember vividly how I always was afraid of this shottype, because it felt uncomfortably intimate as well as too intimate to work with. Well, not anymore.

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